Estimated reading time: 4 minutes
In the current year and age, people want equal responsibilities in a relationship. Whether it is about the finances or responsibilities everything should be 50 50 in a relationship. Without having that the relationship could break because there will be additional responsibilities when it is not 50 50. However, that does not mean that each person in the relationship would give their 50% to the relationship. This commitment level is not what we are referring to here. We are referring to the other parts where it should be always 50 50 in a relationship.
50 50 in a relationship means that each person gives the exact amount of themselves. For everyone, the relationship would be their primary client. If they want to sustain the relationship, otherwise there would not be any point. The effort from both partners should be 100%. But everything else should be divided between the two individuals and it should be 50 50 in a relationship that way. Relationships require fairness, not equity. Therefore, while we do 50 50 in a relationship we should ask ourselves how do I create and maintain a relationship that is fair for me, my partner and the relationship itself.
As you consider bringing fairness to your relationships ask yourself these questions.
- What do I need right now? Is it physical or emotional need?
- Can you sacrifice your own needs to meet the needs of your relationship without feeling resentment?
- What do I want to ask for?
- How does my need impact my partner?
- How does my need impact my relationship?
Relationship fact vs concept
We just talked about being 50 50 in a relationship. But is it going to be possible always? The answer is No. In a serious relationship, you can not have everything 50 50. And that is a fact. Because one or the other way each partner would have to cross the line and do something extra for the relationship to work. Always remember that a healthy relationship is not a one-way street. When two people care about each other, they are not burdened by being self-aware of carrying their own equal amount of weight. They understand that things will not always be perfectly balanced. In a perfect relationship, both individuals need to work as a team.
A healthy relationship is a support system. For the support system to be a true symbiotic system, it needs to be a two-way street. Both the partners should establish themselves as supportive figures in each other’s lives. That is when the relationship will be sustainable. Consider your relationship as an investment that will fetch you the results in the long term. Conducting a relationship as a business deal will be detrimental to your relationship in the long run. When you see your partnership as what and how it benefits you, then you will be more conditional with your actions. You and I all should work more generous culture of giving in our relationships. Instead of thinking about what it has for us. Now giving can be through loving verbally, gifts, words of affirmation, acts of service or just being thoughtful and intentional with the time you give to your partner.
When you realize that your relationship should be your top priority but then you do give priority to your job etc. then you have failed at it already. the relationship needs full effort and attention in order to thrive. Instead of being on opposite sides, you should remember that you are now one team that is working together towards the needs of the relationship. This is why it should always be 50 50 in a relationship.
Yes, by giving priority to your job you might win but then you lose. You lose the intimacy in your relationship, you lose the ability to surprise and delight the one you love. And overall you lose the atmosphere of respect. Instead, you should do your best to understand and support your partner’s dreams. in fact, dream alongside your partner. That is the best that could happen in your relationship. Trust me.
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I am a 31-year-old dude from a lower-middle-class family hailing from a small village Narasinghpur in Cuttack, Odisha, INDIA. I have a post-graduate degree in M.Tech from BITS Pilani. I started blogging back in June 2014. You can check out my journey and all that I have learnt all these years on my website.